By Ipshita Chatterjee, Batch of 2018
This, fuchhas, is the most important piece of advice no one will give you. Instead, they’ll coax you into giving yet another treat at McCain, leaving you broke, possibly in the second week of the month. So here’s all you need to know about laughing your way to the bank, at the end of four years at NSIT (there are many other ways to do that, but more about that later!)
- You are always broke. Yes, that’s right. You might be a hen laying golden eggs, but kiddo, for the rest of the world, you are broke. Wear a perpetually emaciated look about you (hostellers have a natural knack for that). Look as if you jumped right out of bed and rushed to college (that won’t be too much pretension either). So that when the time is right, you can play the “I am broke bro” card with élan and conviction.
- Bargain with the rickshawallas. E-rickshaw charges 10 bucks to the admin. Cycle rickshaw charges 20. Not a penny more, not a penny less. Quick tip – Try to hitch a ride with your friends with the swanky and not-to-swanky cars. Cite reasons like global warming, carpooling, headache, “yeh dosti hum nahi todenge!”,broken legs, broken hearts, zombie apocalypse, an inferi attack and Prisoner of Azkaban outbreaks. It is indeed a long way to Dwarka Mor.
- Beg, borrow, but don’t steal. Life is a delicate balance of teamwork and your friends will have a vital role to play in tiding you over your possible financial woes, till you receive next month’s allowance. Try catch phrases like “Tu bhai hai. Bhai samajhkar de de!” and “You owe me for those 70 ED sheets I made for you. Now is the right time”. And keep the ripostes ready “Kal de doonga pakka!” and “Didn’t I pay you back already?”.
- Identify your target. There is always this one person in your friend circle, either naïve and gullible or genuinely minting money from questionable sources *ahem ahem*, who will more likely than not end up paying for your endless rounds of chilli potatoes, paneer parathas, chowmein, pav bhajis, dosas and cold coffees. Chuck those ideals of chivalry and/or feminism clouding your vision and munch away.
- Seniors to the rescue. I might be digging my own financial grave at this juncture, but yes fuchhas, the undeniable fact remains that “Sir/Ma’am, party!” is the way to go, throughout the first year and the subsequent years. Be it your achievements, their achievements, fests, society meetings, a hostel rendezvous or a casual greeting on a lazy day, this is almost guaranteed to yield you positive results, ranging from a samosa at Mini Zayca to a full-fledged dine-in at BYD. Yum!
- Shop online. Shop smart and cash in on the plethora of discounts up for grabs. Loyalty points, festival discounts, weekday sales, weekend sales and you-name-it-we-have-it sales. Gifts for your girlfriend/boyfriend? Check. Gifts for best friend’s birthday? Check. Sweet nothings to pamper yourself? Check. Online shopping and a good Internet connection? Check.
You must have a whole lot of money to spare, after reading all these tips eh? You owe me a treat for this. *rubs hands in delight* *eyes glint mischievously*